viva-la-nostalgia:

If you don’t have a massive alternative universe in your head with developed people and stories you’re lying.

mydogsnokes:

if u have a pet tarantula i have so many questions for u. first off what the fuck is wrong with u

tell us your most embarrassing story
Anonymous

jesusinc:

jesusinc:

So a while back i was at this party and i was the first girl to arrive and there were like 20 guys already there, we were all siting around, having a beer and whatnot when the dj arrived. So all the guys went out the front of the house to help set up the dj gear and it was just me sitting there alone in the backyard for like 5 minuets. I stood up to go follow them bc i was getting really bored when i realized something, my period had gone through my white pants and stained the while chair, i was humiliated, i had no idea what to do, i could hear the guys were coming back and i had to do something quick, time was running out. So i grabbed the chair, ran like 10 meters and threw it over the fence into the neighboring yard, i quickly walked back and tied my jacket around my waist. The guys soon returned and didn’t suspect a thing, i am amazing.

image

fedorea:

why are men so afraid of women having leg hair???????? women have to put up with ur chest hair and back hair and gross pubic hair and scratchy facial hair all the time and u dont shave that bc ‘it takes too much time’ like…????? ok thanks for ur hypocrisy u dried up sink sponge

hotboyproblems:

do you have any last words??? delete my browser history

claydols:

hello 911? somebody reblogged my post on tumblr.com and said “i cant breathe”. i think i killed someone. i would like to turn myself in

64px:

funandflirtynog:

SNAKES DONT HAVE ARMS? THEY CANT GO BOWLING

fuck. there goes my snake bowling team, fuck this

schmorons:

methdragon:

be there or 

image

Bee rectangle? I dont understand what youre getting at

deepthroatodile:

(credit to amanda thirstfollower for the banner!! she’s great follow her)
hey guys!! so brian and i both recently hit 3k and we decided to do our own tumblr awards!
rules:
mbf both brian and me
reblog this post
likes don’t count but can be used as a bookmark
that’s it tbh
the awards:
cute people (x10)
best smile (x3)
best hair (x3)
best eyebrows (x2)
best jawlines (x2)
nicest (x7)
best url (x4)
best theme (x4)
best original posts (x4)
best icon (x2)
brian’s favorites (x2)
cameron’s favorites (x2)
overall best (x1)
the prizes:
a follow back from both of us (if we aren’t already)
a link on both of our blogs with all of the other winners for most
a special link on our sidebars for the overall winner
any post/selfie reblog you want! just tag us in it or message us and we’ll reblog it!
a spange
i can provide a deepthroatodile
that’s basically it! good luck to everyone and we’ll be choosing when this gets enough notes!!

deepthroatodile:

(credit to amanda thirstfollower for the banner!! she’s great follow her)

hey guys!! so brian and i both recently hit 3k and we decided to do our own tumblr awards!

rules:

  • mbf both brian and me
  • reblog this post
  • likes don’t count but can be used as a bookmark
  • that’s it tbh

the awards:

  • cute people (x10)
  • best smile (x3)
  • best hair (x3)
  • best eyebrows (x2)
  • best jawlines (x2)
  • nicest (x7)
  • best url (x4)
  • best theme (x4)
  • best original posts (x4)
  • best icon (x2)
  • brian’s favorites (x2)
  • cameron’s favorites (x2)
  • overall best (x1)

the prizes:

  • a follow back from both of us (if we aren’t already)
  • a link on both of our blogs with all of the other winners for most
  • a special link on our sidebars for the overall winner
  • any post/selfie reblog you want! just tag us in it or message us and we’ll reblog it!
  • a spange
  • i can provide a deepthroatodile

that’s basically it! good luck to everyone and we’ll be choosing when this gets enough notes!!

lron-man:

girl are you a fox because i don’t know what the fuck you’re saying


  • every sidekick in any movie: you did it!
  • every main character in any movie: no, we did it

withquestionablewit:

oh my god! you’re straight? i never would have guessed. you just seem so nice and pleasant and thoughtful; not at all like the other straights i’ve met

unclefather:

anyone would be lucky to date me. i was “a pleasure to have in class”

if i was famous i would go to the apple store and look for computers where people forgot to log off facebook and post a picture of myself and be like hey guess what you missed

nutthing:

r u a sofa bc ur sofaking annoying